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Re: Tips to deal with trauma memories

Hi @Shasan  i find grounding exercises to be really important when in the middle of flashbacks. Everyone experiences trauma responses differently, but I find carrying a rock (its a pretty one) in my pocket all the time and I pull it out and play with it. I guess it’s similar to folks who use fidget toys. I roll the rock around in my hands, rub my fingers over the bumps and crevices. I’m a sensory person, so touching soft fluffy things also helps ground me. 


You can also do the 5 senses. Listing 5 things you can see, 4 things you can touch, 3 things you can hear, 2 things you can smell and 1 thing you can taste. It’s about focusing on the here and now. 

Another one is TIPP skills. Temperature, intense exercise, paced breathing and progressive relaxation. 

Hopefully others will chime in also

🎀

Re: Tips to deal with trauma memories

Thank you @Bow @hanami @Emelia8 

 

Love the suggestions. I practice mindfulness regularly and the grounding and 5 senses were my first go to and didn't help as much, may be it would have if I stuck with it. Thank you for reminding me - the rock or soft fabric is a great idea. Yes, cold water (Temperature of TIPP?) And thank you for tipp. So grateful!!! I wear a bracelet for this but forgot i could use of t in moment 🙈🙈🙈

 

I think it was experiencing trauma with a combination of feeling terrified that I was having that experience - so it was quite intense and doesn't usually happen. The intrusive images made it worse. I was quite heavily drained and think it got the better of me. 

 

What helped was opp of mindfulness, ie escaping into visual imagery that felt relaxing and bringing compassion, also letting go shame for having these thoughts and feelings. I'm 80% better now.

 

Hopefully tonight will be better but I can sense some anticipatory anxiety.

 

@Emelia8 so sorry for your loss. I can't even imagine 😞 ❤️

Re: Tips to deal with trauma memories

Anticipatory anxiety @Shasan ….. I know that feeling and don’t know how to stop it. I have a trauma anniversary coming up, it’s a month away but I can already feel things creeping up on me. 

Hope tonight is better for you.

🎀

Re: Tips to deal with trauma memories

Oh yes I know anticipatory anxiety well. 

My anxiety can be bad when I have health appts and I anticipate the anxiety which makes me anxious. It's super annoying! 

hugs 

hanami 😘

Re: Tips to deal with trauma memories

Thanks @Shasan  ... yes its been a most difficult 12 months since I lost my husband. 

Had spinal surgery in early February, unfortunately with more intensive two stage surgery still to come.

And had two spells in hospital in MHU, in addition to the surgery and rehab.

So I feel like I have spent more time in hospital this year than I have at home.  In fact .. I have.

Sadly I lost my loyal little companion, my dog Holly, just prior to my surgery too. She had an inoperable tumour.

 

Really glad you are 80% better now than what you were.  I agree that those experiences that you went through, really are very draining and take a heavy physical toll, along with the mental anguish.  Take care.

 

Emelia  💞

Re: Tips to deal with trauma memories

Hi @Shasan  you appear to have some really great strategies and the only thing I can add is that I try to create new memories in my life while acknowledging the painful trauma. I keep telling myself that the “past will not destroy my present or my future”.

 

I do this by walking  along the beach, meeting friends for breakfast, going to live sport and completing tasks. I also have some planned holidays.

 

These do help create new experiences and my mind is not so taken up with trauma.

Re: Tips to deal with trauma memories

Hey @Shasan ,

 

Great thread! In terms of breathing exercises, it’s absolutely grounded in science. I hated breathing exercises in the past until I learnt to do it properly. 

The inhale for 4 and exhale for 6 should be accompanied by a pause in between of about 2 seconds. 

Another point… do you practise breathing regularly? I never practised and I expected it to work when I needed it most. The trick is, set time aside to do it each day. The more you practise, the more adept you’ll be at doing it. In doing so, when you really need it, it will make all the difference.

 

The idea of exhaling for longer than your inhalation is so that you slow your heart rate down. During stress, heart rate increases. So to bring your body back to equilibrium, you use your breath to slow down heart rate which in turn reduces body going into fright/flight/freeze mode.

 

Sorry for the garble but this is what I found helpful when first equipping myself for ways to reduce anxiety and panic attacks.

 

All the best. You can only try.

 

BPDSurvivor

Re: Tips to deal with trauma memories

Hey @Shasan 

 

Not sure how relevant it is, but I do get nightmares a lot.. The other night it I was dodging axes being thrown at me.  While I can feel my body reacting as part of what is happening.. the one thing i do keep reminding myself is that it is not happening now and I am safe. If you can get to that feeling of saftey and remind yourself that you are a bystander just watching an event unfold, you can place some objectivity in what your mind is presenting you. Rather than an emotional reaction of the limbic system, you can start to process the memory in the frontel cortex and apply logical outcomes to what you are seeing. 

 

I hope that makes sense to you but if it does not, feel free to ignore it. 

 

 

Re: Tips to deal with trauma memories

Hello @Shasan 

 

How are you? Are you feeling any better?

 

What a horrible & terrifying experience. Thankyou for sharing & starting this thread, so many great responses. 

After reading your post & thinking about how you described your experience " going through trauma & feeling terrified by the trauma" it occurred to me that perhaps your mind could be processing events that were too big at the time? Perhaps, there was no room for you feel terrified in that moment. I am so sorry.

💜

I have experienced a few night terrors before. I don't know if this is the same as what you are going through. I can understand how awful it feels to be scared of going to sleep. I'm happy for you that you have your therapist to talk through this with.

 

I don't know if this helps, or if it addresses the problem!, The tools I have used in the past to fall back asleep, was repeating of 'mantra/prayer' & having a light on. For me, memorising a longer passage seems to help much more to calm my mind, than shorter affirmations. I am not religious, although maybe very spiritual. 

 

I don't know if this helps any💜 hope you are feeling better. Wishing you peace & strength & love 

Sorry - edit- I also remember hearing once, that if you are having a nightmare, look for a door🚪

 

 

 

 

☮️

Re: Tips to deal with trauma memories

Hi @Shasan Just wanted to check in with you and see how you are going? I don't have any experience with this myself but I have read EMDR therapy can be helpful for PTSD and a therapist actually recommended it to me when I was experiencing something, but I didn't get around to trying it. I'm wondering if anyone has had any experience with this and can share their experience (within guidelines). Hope you are doing OK 💛

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