Am Not Coping

[Zoe7]

@Faith-and-Hope @Appleblossom @BlueBay @Pepsimax @Former-Member @Sans911 @Snowie @Teej @CheerBear @eth @Adge @MDT @TAB @Shaz51 and all following along...

Had a somewhat difficult start to DBT today - things brought up that I had to think about for a while. It was all centred around how I feel about people generally and the impact my childhood and trauma have had on my beliefs. I did talk more with my pdoc about it all this afternoon and will bring it up with my psych when I see her in a couple of weeks. I also talked about the security of being in my little bubble at home with my fur babies and that I really don't want to branch outside that bubble too much - especially right now. Work, DBT and appointments are enough for me to deal with - I know I am getting through the days a little better and don't feel quite so tired but am always glad to be home at the end of the day and all I can really manage is rest - throwing anything else into that mix would exhaust me - that I am very conscious of. Today I feel exhausted and could quite easily go to bed now and sleep until tomorrow.

My pdoc and I also talked about me waking up during the night and the dreams I am having - they are quite vivid but not traumatic as such - they do shake me up a bit though. We have decided to stick with the current meds and dosages and re-assess next appointment (which will be in the holidays) - so if we are going to change anything again I will have a little time to get used to the change. I am reluctant to increase one of my night meds again but if the waking through the night continues we may need to - that I know will make me even more tired in the morning and is not ideal coming into the colder months when mornings are hard anyway.

I really need to do a few things at home this afternoon but the tiredness factor is prominent. I will try after a little rest and only do the couple of things that cannot wait until the weekend. I may even feel a little better once those couple of things are done. It is definitely going to be an early night for me so I can be rested enough to get through the next couple of days at work.

I hope everyone else has had an okay day - some of you I know are doing it tough at the moment and my thoughts are with you all. Love and hugs to you all in however your day has gone 

[TAB]

sounds tough @Zoe7  but you are getting there been terribly slack today but am ill so cant actually do anything, well except soak in bath and lie down

did some very basic stretches hadnt done in ages yest and looks like really put back out plus upset tum and fever last night and flu/head throbbing today lol  well must be feeling a bit better guess, cant wait for tomorrow

[Snowie]

Glad today went ok @Zoe7 even if it started out hard.

Hope you can rest up and get an early night

[Appleblossom]

@Zoe7 

You have achieved so much, I hope there is no pressure to do more than you are able.

This pic caught my eye. I think it is not just about stubbornness also relevant about energy and being empty or preoccupied and not always being able to be there even though we want to.

[Zoe7]

I really like that image @Appleblossom - so much meaning in it.

A lot I need to talk about with my psych when I see her @Snowie. My pdoc and I only touched on it a little today but the after effects of that session have lingered this afternoon.

@TAB Hope you feel better soon.

[TAB]

thanks @Zoe7  been bit off lately and its all come to a head hope you can get some peace

[Zoe7]

I just need some time and some support to work through a couple of things @TAB but will hopefully get that in a couple of weeks when I see my psych - I can always contact the facilitator of DBT if I need to talk through things a bit more before then.

[TAB]

sounds tough @Zoe7   at least there is help if you need it though

[Shaz51]

hugs @Zoe7 

[Zoe7]

How are you today @Shaz51? How has your day been?