Being denied comfort from significant other :/

[PaintedPoet]

I have a history of complicated and bad mental health and my boyfriend also has mental health issues. I’ve never asked him to look after me or to coddle me in any way but throughout the year and half we’ve been together (lived together for a year.) I’ve never never been honest about the  in balance of support until tonight when I needed it most. All I wanted was a hug or some kind of comfort and instead I was met with irritation and when I tried to leave the room I was reprimanded. I was then forced to explain that I didn’t want to fill the void of sound in the room with my crying and he still didn’t care I was once again met with annoyance. I’ve been there for him relentlessly since the beginning and all I wanted was for him to hold me for 5 seconds and to help me to calm down while I was in a panic attack but I was instead met with the whole “well my mental health issues are bad too.” Instead of being heard. 

[Buffwah]

Hi PaintedPoet,

l have a really similar situation in my marriage and l understand how isolating and lonely it can make you feel when your partner can’t give you what you need. 

I’m currently navigating the same issue, during a mental break. This is the reason l came to find this forum. I didn’t even know SANE existed until today. 

l guess, for them it may be too difficult to be in tune with our needs when they’re battling with their own issues. This is what l keep telling myself, when my husband snaps at me. 

Maybe, the best thing for us to do, is talk to one another here, and get the support we need? I don’t know, but one thing is for sure, l don’t want to be a burden on anyone :). 

Please feel free to chat about it, l’m here to listen (read).