Lived Experience Forum

[CheerBear]

I'm trying so hard to find the right support in an unfamiliar, confusing, bounce-you-around system. There's still so much stigma and politics at play that finding the support I need is really difficult.

I finally made progress and had an over the phone counselling session booked as I can't get in to see someone face-to-face. I've held on waiting for it, hoping they could help, running out of time and in real need of support. They didn't call. No message. No rescheduling. Nothing.

It's this stuff - the try but get nowhere, the unhelpful responses, the run around of calls, the repeating difficult stuff, the get up but get knocked back down... that I find makes support seeking so much harder than it should be. It feels like why bother, don't try anymore, just give up.

[Hope4me]

The past couple of days I've answered calls for help by new members and old on this forum. I felt appreciated and accomplished. I'm being triggered though and feel walking away for a time again is necessary.

This saddens me as the company and connections from you beautiful souls fill a void. I've fallen into my age old habit of helping others while neglecting my home life. Finding balance with this endeavour is surely challenging me.

To all who suffer, strive, fall and rise - I love you and wish you well my friends...

Hope xo 

[CheerBear]

I have a huge and impossible feeling decision to make and the only decision I can make is that right now I can't and won't make a decision as I am in no place whatsoever to be doing so. I can see what is going on and everything that is at play, but I can't see a way out or through it at all.

I feel like I'm stuck in the most intense push pull battle I've ever been in. Things that seem clear one moment are blown away in a instant. I choose an option that I am OK with but that OK doesn't last long and it takes nothing to send me right back to the beginning. I'm holding incredibly opposing beliefs and values and can't make any sense of them. I feel so strongly about some of what I am thinking yet sometimes I can't even recognise where those thoughts have come from and who they belong to. I feel like I am losing my mind.

I am starting to worry about the damage and setback this shaky time is causing. I worked so hard to get to OK-ness and I can feel it slipping by each day I sit not knowing what is right to do. I'm driving myself absolutely crazy.

[eudemonism]

The very thought of everything being just fine, if i work hard enough and make exactly the right choices, is truly deluded, in it's own right. However, my resiliency can become more adapted and adjustable to the variety of chaotic, detrimental and adverse factors I'm faced with, which appear to be man-made *whether they are merely perceived and justified or not. & although i and my faith-safeguard and protect me-There is always the weak spot in MY armour-which we all have, which is just waiting to remind me of my weaknesses and vulnerabilities as a human being... -i believe this to be a universal approach... although we're all different and unique??? In our own way...

[Shaz51]

my worry that I am leaving here and walking away is we have have a heatwave up her for the last week and now it looks like we have a cyclone coming !!!!!!!

[Teej]

I never reply here @Shaz51 but I said a big loud "oh NO" when I read your post. You’ve had such a difficult year. I hope everything will be ok. You are in my thoughts. 💜🤗

[Shaz51]

I know my wonderful sister @Teej, we don`t need it xxx

[Teej]

I just looked it up before @Shaz51

Here it is

its still a long way off and could go in any direction. I read the forecast which does say it’s heading south for now. They say they don’t have any real idea what it will do after Tuesday which I’m crossing fingers for you that it racks off. Big hugs 💜🤗

[Shaz51]

thank you for that @Teej, that makes it feel better my sister  xxxxx

[eudemonism]

I'm worried about the latest bongo brain outbreak-i don't wanna get infected again.