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HopefulWarrior
Senior Contributor

how do you connect to "your power"

hi all and good evening - hope you're all having a nice evening

@NatureLover @Maggie @outlander @Shaz51 @Dizzylizzy 

need advice. i've tagged a few people of those i can remember but happy for anyone to reply. 

 

find myself, AGAIN, in the vortex of using behaviours throughout my day to effectively manage anxiety, depression etc - to numb, then often feel like shite in the evening and it all comes undone. 

 

my team have flagged that things physcially are going downhill, but even that is not motivating me to switch gears.

 

and at times i can even see myself from above in like a bubble going about my day to day life - floating around others and feeling/ appreciating how disconnected i am from others and life in general.

 

 

everything I read or talk to team relates to "choosing in the moment to do something different" but that seems, at times, impossible.  i'm scared to leave my comfort zone, even when at times this construct can feel like a prison.

 

how have others dealt with this?  

 

have you had success in connecting / plugging into this "power"?  

 

 

i'm sending this off and hoping it makes sense . didn't want or think helpful to go into specifics of behaviours so as to not trigger others.

 

 

14 REPLIES 14

Re: how do you connect to "your power"

Hey @HopefulWarrior ,

 

Just wanted to give some support, and lend my knowledge to your situation. I can hear that you're really putting in effort to make some changes, but that things are still feeling difficult for you. In my experience it is quite normal to hit 'walls' like this during your healing journey, and sometimes it's about taking a moment to stop and reflect on how far you've come. 

 

Human beings are creatures of habit, which is why your comfort zone feels so appealing. That is totally okay! It is where we find safety, especially within the scope of things that have helped us in the past (even if those things no longer serve us, or even hinder us now). On this, I often think of the quote "all progress takes place outside of the comfort zone". That is to say, sometimes we need to push ourselves outside of it to learn and grow - but it is also okay to stay within our comfort zone for a time as well whilst we process and integrate our learning. 

 

Another thing you've mentioned:

and at times i can even see myself from above in like a bubble going about my day to day life - floating around others and feeling/ appreciating how disconnected i am from others and life in general.

I'm not trained to make any kind of diagnostic call, but that sounds like it could be a form of dissociation. It might be something to talk to your mental health team about. It is sometimes a way your mind is trying to keep you safe - grounding is the most often used coping tool to help with states of dissociation. 

 

I hope this is helpful!! Heart

Re: how do you connect to "your power"

thank you @Jynx for your thoughtful reply and support its much appreciated when feeling overwhelmed (and quite alone as i've not many people in my life who understand the struggles)

 

i read your post and think yer for sure that makes alot of sense - but really sturggle to do it - in the momment - choosing instead to rush around like an idiot.  not allowing myself to try different things cause I'm scared to let go of the numbing behaviours.  cscared to face the reality of the shite place I find myself in.  this stuff is really hard isn't it?!?!

 

 

 

Re: how do you connect to "your power"

Greetings @HopefulWarrior  and @Jynx  and all who may come.

You have given yourself the answer to what you seek, because you are a master.
Its very understandable the situation you find yourself in.
As a lived experience I have been through this too and I hope that what I have to share can help you to navigate the way out (which is in).

but before we begin, @Jynx
I know that you mean well and are only trying to help,
but Please be careful with sayings like "Human beings are creatures of habit", this is not imperically true, it is only a belief system which paints a false idea that we all have to accept some form of illusiary limitation and flaw, it hinders growth.
Habit's are something that we don't know we are doing, but once we know we are doing them; it is a CHOICE. To know that we have choice is part of putting the power back in our hands. So it is about being conscious and also in this case dropping the habit of thinking that humans are creatures of habit, but that's your choice to keep it or not and if it serves you in some way by all means keep using it.

Now @HopefulWarrior 
To see yourself floating above, tells me that it's about a disassociation/distancing with your story and your situation because it's probably too scary and overwhelming to face.

Well, there are a few aspects to this, though all are linked,
Fundamentally, this is about Responsibility, and it is also how one connects to their power.
When I say Responsibility i'm not talking about blame in the negative sense as it has been misused in society, i'm talking about taking ownership of your story.
To take ownership of your life and where you are now, to step into the driver seat of your vehicle and to put your hand on the wheel to take your life back into your hands.
And that's a wonderful thing!

If you choose not to be the driver and take the wheel, then it is "out of your hands" both figuratively and literally.

Because when we choose to be in the driver seat, only then can we steer our vehicle in the direction we wish to go.
And only when you accept your reality as it is, can it then become something else.

The depression and anxiety are closely linked and related to this aswell.
Depression arises from an identification to the personality constructs, events and experiences of the past that were created and accumulated unconsciously over a period of time, it always belongs to the past, (memory) and the story of "me".

It doesn't have to have any power over who you choose to be in this presence, unless you say that it does because the choice is always in your hands, because within every given moment we have that choice and it is you who are the first and foremost authority on you, not parents, not teachers, not any doctor, and certainly not any psych with their labels or diagnosis of who and what they think you are, it is you who are the boss of you and no-one knows you better than you, nor let them try to tell you otherwise.

The past we can't change, it's something we all must accept.
But we can forgive ourselves to be liberated from any "pains of the past" by making peace with the past.
Letting go of the past doesn't mean avoidance, or denial of the path we took that got us here, but rather; to acknowledge, recognise and even to have gratitude, for ALL the rungs on the ladder which helped us here as valid steps of the process.
A Caterpillar cannot become a Butterfly without the darkness of the Cocoon first.
It doesn't matter how dark or unpleasant each rung of the ladder may have been, each was valid and played a part, each was worthy and valuable experiences to get you to where you are now and without each and every rung on that ladder, without each and every step of the way; we would not be here now, reading this and going through this phenomenal opportunity for transformation, to hatch from that cocoon and to emerge free in full vibrant colour and splendour.

Have you heard the saying to "be the change you want to see in the world"? To have and make the vote for the world we want to see.
We can choose from this presence right now, what we want our life to be and what world we want to create, every action is a vote.

Your current situation and what you see around you is the result of past thoughts, emotions, behaviours and actions.
Being present in the moment, is not really something that needs to be done, there is no effort,
because it always is the present. 
The present is like a blank canvas, we can paint what we want.

We choose from this moment what we want our life to be, and what we want our world to be, with unlimited possibilities.

So I hope that you and we collectively choose something wonderful.

Namaskaram,

Guiding_Light

Re: how do you connect to "your power"

@HopefulWarrior  Yes, I understand exactly what you are experiencing.

 

Ive read the other responses, some food for thought.

Just letting you know I’m following along, but have nothing to add at the moment.

Re: how do you connect to "your power"

@HopefulWarrior , connecting to your power is a statement I hear every session with my intuitive counsellor Nat. I completely understand where you are, but like @Maggie  i have nothing to add. Just want to let you know I get it as well. 💖

Re: how do you connect to "your power"

@Former-Member @Maggie @Guiding_Light @Jynx 

 

(just spent 10mins writing a lengthy reply to then press wrong button and it get cancelled!!!)  so my apologises am running out of time so this will be short and sweet.

 

firstly thank you to you all for replying to my message - reaching out and validating the struggle.  a big piece of my illness and difficulity getting out of the hole is the sense of isolation - which this forum is so good at combatting.

 

@Guiding_Light  thank you for your thoughtful and wise post.  it hit me square between the eyeballs - the image of the catepillar needing the darkness is beautiful!   choice, responsibility and ill add in accountability is so key to this process/journey and life in general.

 

after a few things collided i;ve accepted an inpaitent admission to get additional support with self care - help me get back on track.

 

I will continue to use and support this forum - its a lifeline! and worth it's weight in gold.

Re: how do you connect to "your power"

@HopefulWarrior , sending you lots of love and light my sweet friend. Congratulations on taking the next step in your healing process. Look forward to seeing you on the other side of your treatment. Keep well and stay safe. 💜💖💚❤️

Re: how do you connect to "your power"

thank you @Former-Member

Re: how do you connect to "your power"

Hi @HopefulWarrior , hope you're travelling OK...as well as possible, I mean. 

 


@HopefulWarrior wrote:

after a few things collided i;ve accepted an inpaitent admission to get additional support with self care - help me get back on track.


Good for you...I hope it will be very beneficial 🙂

 

I haven't responded to your thread yet as I'm not sure what "connecting to your power" means...I've never heard of it before your post. I was wondering if you could explain it to me, if that's OK?

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