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20-03-2019 06:35 PM
20-03-2019 06:35 PM
Feeling fragile after a bad day but I am still here ... just!
Today has been a bad day and yet I have survived even though I feel totally depleted right now. It takes so much energy to be constantly caring, understanding, patient and calm.
I feel tonight like I just need some silence and some space. The noise has been constant all day and the clutter just keeps accumulating .
Mr W has unipolar mania so only has elevation. He has so many deals and plans and schemes and becomes so hard and uncaring and destructive.
So we need to care for ourselves to survive another day. I just did a food shop and as I was putting things away I stood up and banged my head into the freezer door. Moments like these, when I just burst into tears , make me realise how tired and fragile I am sometimes and how important it is to care for ourselves too.
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20-03-2019 09:04 PM
20-03-2019 09:04 PM
Re: Feeling fragile after a bad day but I am still here ... just!
Yikes - just when you think things are bad enough bumping ones head on the freezer door adds insult to injury - feels at times we just can't win.
You might consider using one of these safety devices next time you are putting the groceries away 😃
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21-03-2019 05:00 AM
21-03-2019 05:00 AM
Re: Feeling fragile after a bad day but I am still here ... just!
Thanks @Former-Member
Might be a good idea
Maybe a suit of armour to just stay protected from everything for a few hours s day
🤔
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21-03-2019 08:44 AM
21-03-2019 08:44 AM
Re: Feeling fragile after a bad day but I am still here ... just!
The old emotional armour @Dunks - tempting to use but is bulky and restrictive. Emotional resilience however is the new soldier attire.
Learning about MI and getting some counseling for myself made a huge difference for me; I now understand why I respond like I do and what I need to do to cope better. Relationally, I assured Mr Darcy was on his team, advocated for him when necessary, but encourage him to remain I'm treatment - sadly when things are broken, there is no pain free solution.
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21-03-2019 08:47 AM
21-03-2019 08:47 AM
Re: Feeling fragile after a bad day but I am still here ... just!
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21-03-2019 08:51 AM
21-03-2019 08:51 AM
Re: Feeling fragile after a bad day but I am still here ... just!
PS @Dunks
I do know what you mean - there are times when we do need a shield to protect us and we do need wisdom to know when we are best holding our tongues.
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21-03-2019 08:53 AM
21-03-2019 08:53 AM
Re: Feeling fragile after a bad day but I am still here ... just!
I so agree with you @Former-Member but some days the armour is needed to get through the day but not every day.
I really loved those YouTube links you suggested .... I got a lot more of an understanding around the unipolar mania and also how I was feeling.
One day at a time and always feeling grateful for all that is in my life.
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21-03-2019 09:04 AM
21-03-2019 09:04 AM
Re: Feeling fragile after a bad day but I am still here ... just!
I know it is @Dunks and there are times when it is necessary to remove emotion from the equation.
Yikes Dunks, I am sounding like my mother, please don't be put off by my ramblings, we all need to vent ...
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21-03-2019 09:07 AM
21-03-2019 09:07 AM
Re: Feeling fragile after a bad day but I am still here ... just!
Not rambling at al @Former-Member
I so appreciate just being able to share without judgement and learn from you and others so thank you