Skip to main content
Illustration of people sitting and standing

New here?

Chat with other people who 'Get it'

with health professionals in the background to make sure everything is safe and supportive.

Register

Have an account?
Login

cancel
Showing results for 
Search instead for 
Did you mean: 

Looking after ourselves

Vanro
Casual Contributor

Exhaustion

I am exhausted coping with my son's mental illness.

12 REPLIES 12

Re: Exhaustion

It is exhausting 😔
Do you have someone to talk to? Can you write down your feelings to get them out?

Re: Exhaustion

Thanks for your interest.  Do others just get drained and exhausted?  I do all the things to keep me sane and have stayed sane for 40 years most of the time but I just find that at 81 years he is just wearing me out.  He need to have his meds reviewed but that is a waste of my time and energy also when nothing changes.  I have made the phone calls.  And as you would all know unless he is a danger to himself or others nothing much will happen.  He has support workers and recently they too have been finding him a challenge as he just talks at them at the top of his voice non stop with all his delusions and disordered thinking.  There is no real solution but just doing one day at a time and staying on the positives.   The only thing that works is medication and he has talked to the mental health 'registrar' - there is no longer a psychiatrist - don't know why - into reducing his meds.  No need to offer any advice or solutions but as I am isolated it helps when there are others who know what I am talking about.  Thanks

Re: Exhaustion

Hi @Vanro 

 

What a tough situation you are in. I can imagine how exhausted you must be. I'm so glad though that you  reached out and found these forums. There are many amazing members here who are supportive and empathetic and some who might relate to your situation.

 

I'll share the Carer Gateway website here that has information that may be helpful for you. 

 

Hugs,

Hanami 💮

Re: Exhaustion

Hi @Vanro,

I was just reading your post and I wanted to let you know I get where you are coming from. A close family member of mine has had bipolar for roughly 20 years and I have been pretty much his only support person most of this time (outside his professional team). 

My family member is doing okay with his medication and therapy but I understand how the system works and how tiring it can be supporting someone who needs a lot of emotional support over many years. I can imagine as you are getting older things may be getting harder for you personally as well so having someone you need to constantly support would get to be exhausting.

I wish I could offer you some guidance or some magic solution but I know that's not what you need. Just know I hear you and I really do get where you are coming from.  I agree with you, just one day at a time and stay on the positives.

Wishing you all the best - take care,

FloatingFeather 

Re: Exhaustion

I have just signed up for this forum now and I feel the exact same way. Exhausted and tired of the repeating circle.

Re: Exhaustion

Welcome to the forums @Tania88! My name is Sirius, one of the peer support workers here at SANE - it's nice to e-meet you. 😊 

It sounds like you might be going through something a little heavy at the moment. Are you doing okay? I'd like to acknowledge the strength and courage to takes to reach out. The forums are a wonderful safe community where you'll hopefully find new connections, information and loads of support.

Alternatively if you're interested in chatting one-to-one, you could also reach out to the SANE team of counsellors by phone, email or web chat from 10am to 10pm Monday to Friday AEST. The phone number is: 1800 187 263

 

Go gently with yourself @Tania88 and I hope I see you around in the forums. 😊

Sirius

Re: Exhaustion

Hi Tania88

Yep. Just signed up myself one minute ago for exactly the same reason. Feeling sad and exhausted. Still this is my first ever venture into online forums and I really think it has helped just that tiny bit to know there really are many of us. My husband of 29 years has schizophrenia. He only had two episodes of psychosis previously but they are very hard to treat and last for multiple years even with antipsychotics. He has slipped into his third episode this past 12 months, so yes... I now have lost hope he can stay well. Instead I am trying to work on acceptance and gaining some distance from his delusions by committing to attend support groups for myself and then starting to go outside these four walls and do something I like.  Dont know what yet and how, but I know I need to do it.  Replying on this forum is a big first step for me. Well done you, for posting. Take care 

Re: Exhaustion

Hello, I have just signed up. Not sure what to say, except Im relating to whats being said. Im entering absolute exhaustion to. My heart goes out to you

Re: Exhaustion

I am not sure this reply will get to all those kind people who offered me support.  It has been a very long journey since I was 21 and had my son, born with brain damage. 

I have endlessly made an effort to stay balanced and supportive. 

I do realise that an old brain even though it seems to working OK still, I am doing an online course in Italian, finds it hard to keep decoding what seems like nonsense coming out of his mouth at times.  If I don't, I find things are happening, that if I let it go by I have more problems to deal with.  Recently he was going on about how he could not pick up the mail when he goes into town.  He can still drive but not far.  The reason was it was too tiring to get in and out of the car?????  It did not make sense BUT most of what he says does not make sense.

Well the outcome was that he announced he had been to the GP and that he had to go to the hospital for a scan - he had a swollen testicle.  There is so much prostate cancer in the family on both sides I was really worried.  It turned out to be a bladder infection which had moved into his testicle.  So then I knew why getting in and out of the car had been an issue for him.

I find I need to get away for a day from it all.  I know he gets anxious but I need to take care of myself.  I drive into the next town - 56 kms away and stay the day. I also do online courses as it gives my brain a rest to do something logical and gives my mind a focus on something normal.

Now I must tell you something funny????  I have been getting ready for my day out on Monday and really looking forward to it.  Have to take my own food as I have IBS.  Only going to the dentist for a check up- but it seems although I made the appointment 5 weeks ago it no longer exists????  I was really upset and disappointed------but  once I calmed down I started laughing  ----- that is what mental illness does to a person.  I was not getting my day out BUT I think I will still go as I really need that time out.   I do not do anything, there is a place I can stay and I just watch TV - something I never do here as there is too much work or my son's stuff.  I actually never really relax here.

So I do appreciate the support and I do know how bad it can be and how it never ends, and how it beats up my brain until I have trouble concentrating.  So if you are into praying which I am not ----  I just ask whatever is out there to help me accept the unacceptable.  It does seem to help.  Love to you all to keep going one day at a time.  I am getting teary as I feel so sad that you all live with this in your lives.😏  

Illustration of people sitting and standing

New here?

Chat with other people who 'Get it'

with health professionals in the background to make sure everything is safe and supportive.

Register

Have an account?
Login

For urgent assistance


Mental Health Australia All rights reserved.